How Goal Setting Transformed My Life and Business

From unhappiness to resilience, how embracing life’s crossroads taught me the power of goals , in acting, business, and family life.

Goal setting has been a theme in my life since 1998. I often find myself at a crossroads, what I like to call my ‘Alice Moments’. Most people hate them, but me? I kind of like them. I follow the white rabbit, see what happens, and trust myself to figure it out on the way down.

It all began when I was faced with unexpected debt and the decision to sell my home. By 2005, I’d made my “great escape,” moving back in with my parents, and by February 2006, I was divorced. Brutal? Yes. But it forced me to stop drifting and actually plan.

The next big pivot was university, which carried me through 2007 to 2008.

A Life on the Road

Then came Dennis. At the time, I was at a crossroads, wondering whether I should continue chasing auditions or use my degree to build a new future.

To support myself as an actor and to pay my way through university I supplemented my acting work by working as an experiential event manager and sales trainer. On paper, it seemed exciting, it was a mix of fun, grit, and ridiculousness.

Picture this: living out of a tiny suitcase, driving a Luton van or a car branded to advertise a product. Every day was filled with building promotional stands; my mobile phone tucked in my boot and a screwdriver in my hand or pocket.

I would wash uniforms in hotel sinks, roll them in towels, and pray they’d dry by morning, all while charging my gadgets overnight for the next day’s event.

Each day began with fostering team spirit among new staff, and it felt rewarding especially when I spotted someone I had worked with before.

I loved life on the raod and the money I was earning was great, it was not exactly a retirement plan and unless I wanted to end up in an actor’s benevolent home, I knew I had to make a change.

Planning Together, Planning Apart

When Dennis came into my life, everything shifted. We began planning together, but also independently, always working toward the same end goal. It was a bit like two people skating a figure of eight, moving separately at times but always crossing paths.

So I stepped away from freelancing, where I was earning over £200 a day as an event manager and trainer. On paper, it looked like a terrible decision, but deep down, I knew it was right.

From Retail Profiling to Hanwha Vision

I started small with Retail Profiling, then joined D-Link, and later moved on to Hanwha Vision (formerly known as Hanwha/Samsung Techwin).

At D-Link, I began to thrive, and this continued when I took on the challenge of launching the IT channel at Samsung Techwin.

I enjoyed the fast-paced and challenging role of channel management. It was diverse and engaging; one moment I was overseeing channel communications, the next I was implementing sales training or organising and running sales incentive days.

I focused on building relationships and simplifying technology for both resellers and end users. It was rewarding to see sales grow because of these efforts.

Although I initially had no idea how to build an HTML newsletter, I was already skilled in communication. Thanks to Rod Slater at Exertis, I gained a deeper understanding of how to connect with an audience through digital marketing. The lessons I learned about digital communication during that time continue to influence my work today.

Launching KVDB

Then came KVDB. Thanks to the TechPixies, I filled in the gaps in my knowledge about social media platforms. I had run campaigns, analysed data, and created monthly, quarterly, and yearly business reviews. Bringing together this experience with my acting training was thrilling.

And then I met Gill Gayk. She’s now my partner in Cultivating Confidence, but the first time I met her was at a Women in Business event run by Howard Feather, where she was presenting on goal mapping. She asked the room, “Do you set goals?” Without hesitation, I said yes, because I always have and always will.

Goals in Everyday Life

During one of my many conversations with Gill Gayk, I realised that in every one of my ‘Alice Moments’, goal-setting has been there, quietly guiding my decisions.

You see, goals are not always what you think they are. For someone recovering from surgery, it could be getting up and drinking a cup of tea. For a busy parent, it might be making sure the snack box is in the school bag. For a child, it could be learning those tricky spellings.

Goals are everywhere, and no matter how small, they help you move forward.

We’ve even built goal-setting into how we raise our daughter. Our rules are simple: eat this, and you earn; keep your room tidy, and you can have sleepovers; do your homework, and you can buy a toy up to a certain value. Goal setting is woven into the fabric of our family.

Another Crossroads

And here I am again, staring at another crossroads.

This summer, life shifted. Our daughter turned nine, we moved into our forever home, and she’s been spreading her personality across her room; fairy lights, lilac cushions, slogans on the walls, you name it.

Then came Roblox. Thank you, Zoe Jane Morrall, for convincing me to play with her, it taught me so much. We sit side by side, playing games, with her explaining slang words I don’t understand. She takes over whenever I get Dress to Impress wrong (apparently that is my default setting, even when dressing in the themes of my younger days, before she was even born!).

Somewhere between playing Roblox and her rolling her eyes at my fashion sense, I realised something: she’s growing up.

From fairy lights and lilac cushions to lip gloss, borrowed perfume, her own choice of body spray, and an ever-evolving sense of style, she is becoming her own person. She still needs me in different ways. I want to be at her school matches; she’s growing up too fast for me to miss that.

Watching her grow has made me realise I have more time for myself and the freedom to embrace more meaningful work and to step into the next chapter with confidence.

Looking Ahead

When I launched KVDB, I had so many ideas. And those ideas are still alive today:

• Running public speaking and on-camera workshops
• Designing EU communication strategies
• Helping clients launch on YouTube
• Supporting people to find their next role with a refreshed LinkedIn profile or CV
• Guiding businesses to tell their stories with confidence

So here I am, ready for my next ‘Alice Moment’. I call them that because, like Alice, I’m willing to tumble down the rabbit hole, sip the “Drink Me,” nibble the “Eat Me,” and trust myself to land on my feet, no matter how curious the journey becomes.

Maybe it’s my acting background. It taught me resilience, the value of adaptability, and how to embrace uncertainty until it became part of my DNA.

The truth is, I’m a hybrid. Life inside an organisation works for me, and so does running a business. Just like hybrid working today, I don’t need to choose one box; I can blend the best of both.

✨ And maybe that’s what goal setting has taught me all along. It isn’t about following a straight line. It’s about being brave enough to redraw the map and adventurous enough to enjoy the wonder when the path changes